Tag: Animal

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17 Views0 Comments

If you have a parrot and you don't teach it to say, "Help, they've turned me into a parrot", you are wasting everybody's time.


17 Views0 Comments

I noticed a mouse popping it's head out of a hole from a skirting board in my bedroom , so I rang the Enviromental health Agency. The bloke arrived shortly afterwards I and we stood in my bedroom and waited for the mo...


19 Views0 Comments

I'm new to farming, but I recently purchased several thousand battery hens based upon a sound business plan and excellent return on investment figures. I don't wish to waste any money, so before I release any further ...


16 Views0 Comments

Went to the zoo the other day Some cuddly black and white bears in stockings were going berserk It was sheer pandemonium.


18 Views0 Comments

For a split second before you hit that rabbit in the car headlight, do you recon it thinks its about to be abducted by a UFO?


17 Views0 Comments

Is it more offensive telling my black friend that she smells like my dog, or telling my dog she smells like a black person?


19 Views0 Comments

"It's just a spider, it's more scared of you than you are of it" my Dad told me. Pretty stupid advice for a housefly.


19 Views0 Comments

An old farmer's dog goes missing and he is inconsolable. His wife says to him, "why don't you put an ad in the paper to get him back". The farmer does this, but after two weeks the dog is still missing. "What did you ...


21 Views0 Comments

What do giraffes have that no other animal has? Baby giraffes.


15 Views0 Comments

I think it's unexceptable to mix races. You never see Horses and Dogs racing in one race do you.


19 Views0 Comments

Not everyone hates muslims. Mosquitos find them very attractive.


15 Views0 Comments

Pigeon: "Do you think I should say 'coo, coo, coo?'" Sparrow: "It's your call."

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