Tag: Advice

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22 Views0 Comments

Never trust a woman who has a pet snake, or any pets, or no pets.


25 Views0 Comments

Unwritten rules: we should just write them down and then there'd be no argument.


21 Views0 Comments

Dont discard your old Banana skins, they make ideal sun hats for starfish.


21 Views0 Comments

If there was slightly wider bottleneck of Jack Daniel's bottle, I swear to God I would never marry anyone.


25 Views0 Comments

Old people. Attach a sweeping brush to the front of your mobility trolley. Now, instead of being a menace on the pavements, you can provide a valuable service to your community.


22 Views0 Comments

Extremists Do you want to blow yourself up for a good cause and get hundreds of virgins? I suggest ComicCon


22 Views0 Comments

Can't get approval for a savings account? Simply move in with a Tourette's sufferer, introduce a swearbox and watch your investment grow.


17 Views0 Comments

When ever a child asks me why God let so many people die in a disaster , I tell them its because they distracted him by praying for a puppy.


22 Views0 Comments

Smell gas? Locate the suspected leak by striking an ordinary match in every room in the house until a loud explosion reveals the source of the escaping gas.


24 Views0 Comments

My boyfriend says that I never solve my own problems. How do I prove him wrong?


26 Views0 Comments

Lets face it.. maybe you won't get ripped in 3 weeks. However, you might grow a beard, change race and facial shape, so the ad is worth a look.


25 Views0 Comments

Taking the decision to bend over and tie your shoelaces on a moving escalator injects the added thrill of a 'time limit'.

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