Category: Advice

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74

129 Views0 Comments

I recently went to Birmingham with low expectations, and I left disappointed.

419

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Crimewatch - Get more viewers and make your reconstructions less harrowing by simply putting them on fast forward and have Benny Hill music playing in the background.

245

132 Views0 Comments

Top tip; Never attempt to operate a chainsaw whilst fairly drunk. There's a good chance you'll end up legless.

318

162 Views0 Comments

I was on the plane coming back from holiday. The Air hostess was going through the safety procedures, when she got to the part where she said, "In the event of a water landing your seat cushion can be used as a floata...

66

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People shouldn't worry about the world ending. It's already tomorrow in Australia!

268

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end of the world in 2012? just immigrate to romania.they are 100 years behind....

110

135 Views0 Comments

My mates warned me against going home with an Afro-Carribbean hairdresser last night. Woke up this morning and I've got braids.

I saw a scruffy looking young man sat on the street this morning

135 Views0 Comments

I saw a scruffy looking young man sat on the street this morning behind a card that read: "Help the Homeless" So I gave him the number of an estate agent I know.

For people who suffer from a sweaty face in the hot season…

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For people who suffer from a sweaty face in the hot season... You can spray regular deodorant on your face to help reduce the problem. Just make sure you keep your eyes open so you can see where you are spraying it.

“Russian Girls looking for you!”

144 Views0 Comments

"Russian Girls looking for you!" Erm, yeah, that doesn't sound like a good thing.

Men; would you like to last longer in bed?

139 Views0 Comments

Men; would you like to last longer in bed? Then get your wife to bring breakfast to you.

23

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Tip for the day: 'Harder' is not a good choice of safe word.