Category: Advice

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91 Views0 Comments

I always give waiters a tip, but they never seem to appreciate my advice.


93 Views0 Comments

MESSAGE TO ALL SECURITY EQUIPMENT COMPANIES; Save money on expensive motion-sensor equipment, by replacing them all with automatic had-driers.


91 Views0 Comments

Uh.. If you have a good joke, wait til the site is running normally so we can actually vote it up? Don't waste it you gimps.


99 Views0 Comments

Helpful hint #1 When arranging to meet a girl from the internet, who "spreads 'em easily".... Make sure she doesn't mean diseases.


93 Views0 Comments

"Beware: Peanuts may cause small children to choke" What kind of society do we live in where murder tips are advertised on the back of peanut wrappers?!


97 Views0 Comments

My mates keep telling me that if I keep believing everything they keep saying to me, my brain will explode. So now I accuse them of lying, just in case.


96 Views0 Comments

In the Government's new move to offer free sports equipment to schools in deprived areas, I beg the Prime Minister to avoid baseball, archery and shooting.


109 Views0 Comments

I regularly drive to the pub, but am never guilty of drink driving. The secret is to consume so much alcohol that by closing time you have completely forgotten ever owning a car.


98 Views0 Comments

Pubs. Save money on hand driers by just hanging up a pair of jeans.


104 Views0 Comments

Hiccups sufferers: Become a bomb-diffuser. That way, the resultant terror of an ill-timed hiccup will instantly cure those troublesome hiccups.


118 Views0 Comments

I asked a wise old man what the secret was to 'eternal life'. He said "Don't die"


99 Views0 Comments

We went out for an awesome night of delight and romance tonight, on our return home my girlfriend shocked me by asking me to hit her with my most private fantasy. Tera Patricks POV Box Set wasn't quite what she was th...